I have added a question to the pre-marital counseling I do. The question is, “What would hold this marriage together if you could not have sex?”
The purpose of this question is to get the couple to think about their relationship is there was not a physical dimension to it. What is the basis for your love outside of the physical part of the relationship. What ultimately is your love for one another founded upon?
What is our love for God founded upon? Is it love to say I love God because of what God has done for me? I believe it most certainly could be. A deep relationship can be built out of acts of sacrifice and devotion. Certainly the cross was an ultimate act of love and commitment by Jesus. But for the relationship to become more than a attitude of gratitude there must be more to the connection. For our love to founded upon what God has done there must be a desire that comes from God’s action that makes us desire to want a deeper attachment and a growing commitment. Eventually the love founded upon the action must lead to a love of the character God. This love of character can only come about through a developing intimacy. Intimacy comes from vulnerability (trust) and commitment.
This seems complicated. It should be. If it is complicated it is less likely to be taken for granted. A relationship that is taken for granted is in danger of being an illusion rather than a reality. God never takes us for granted. Do we take God for granted? This is no way to love the Lord our God with all our hearts, soul, and might.