“There are two loves, the love of God and the love of the world. If the love of the world takes possession of you, there is no way for the love of God to enter into you. Let the love of the world take the second place, and let the love of God dwell in you. Let the better love take over.” — St. Augustine
The third element of true love is a commitment to transparency. This may seem nonsensical in the light of the omniscience nature of God since God knows everything but it is not. Transparency in this case is about our willingness to be total open to God though our being totally open and honest with ourselves.
Do not deceive yourselves. If you think that you are wise in this age, you should become fools so that you may become wise.
19 For the wisdom of this world is foolishness with God. For it is written, “He catches the wise in their craftiness,”
20 and again, “The Lord knows the thoughts of the wise, that they are futile.” (1 Cor. 3:18-20 NRS)
We human beings are quite good at self deception. We have a tendency to believe what we want to believe no matter how far from the truth it may be. We are more than willing to listen to lives and deceptions.
Paul, James and John warn us about this:
Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these things the wrath of God comes on those who are disobedient. (Eph. 5:6 NRS)
But be doers of the word, and not merely hearers who deceive themselves. (Jas. 1:22 NRS)
If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. (1 Jn. 1:8 NRS)
When these verses are examined in context they call us to self-examination, to self-reflection which should lead to confession and a reorientation of our understanding and responses. This transparency allows the Holy Spirit to bring transformation in our lives.
Love does not force this transparency. It must be a willing decision on our part.